1 00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:04,599 Slimy Stuarts, vile Victorians 2 00:00:04,600 --> 00:00:06,999 castles, daring knights 3 00:00:07,000 --> 00:00:09,799 Cut-throat Celts, awful Egyptians 4 00:00:09,800 --> 00:00:12,199 Punishment from ancient times 5 00:00:12,200 --> 00:00:15,039 Cavemen savage, fierce and toothless 6 00:00:15,040 --> 00:00:18,039 measly Middle Ages 7 00:00:18,040 --> 00:00:20,759 8 00:00:20,760 --> 00:00:23,279 9 00:00:23,280 --> 00:00:26,239 10 00:00:26,240 --> 00:00:27,519 11 00:00:27,520 --> 00:00:29,320 12 00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:34,240 Horrible Histories presents... 13 00:00:38,480 --> 00:00:40,239 - Romans! 14 00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:42,639 Have you heard about our new Roman laws? 15 00:00:42,640 --> 00:00:44,439 - Have you heard about knocking before you come in? 16 00:00:44,440 --> 00:00:46,879 - That's right, us Romans have finally 17 00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:47,919 taken our traditions 18 00:00:47,920 --> 00:00:52,239 and unspoken rules and written them down, making laws. 19 00:00:52,240 --> 00:00:54,079 - Is there one about knocking before you come in? 20 00:00:54,080 --> 00:00:55,439 - Shhh, you! 21 00:00:55,440 --> 00:00:57,959 Welcome to the all new, 12 Tables. 22 00:00:57,960 --> 00:01:01,159 The foundations of Roman law that you have to live by. 23 00:01:01,160 --> 00:01:02,519 Building a road? 24 00:01:02,520 --> 00:01:04,479 Our new laws state that each road should be at least 25 00:01:04,480 --> 00:01:05,839 eight feet wide. 26 00:01:05,840 --> 00:01:07,279 How wide is yours? 27 00:01:07,280 --> 00:01:09,119 - Seven feet. - Start again. 28 00:01:09,120 --> 00:01:11,559 - You can't make me do that, I've already done 35 miles! 29 00:01:11,560 --> 00:01:13,359 - Sorry, that's the law. 30 00:01:13,360 --> 00:01:15,439 - Grrr! 31 00:01:15,440 --> 00:01:18,199 - Selling your child into slavery? There are rules against that. 32 00:01:18,200 --> 00:01:19,919 Yes! - Oh great. - Come on! 33 00:01:19,920 --> 00:01:22,079 - You're only allowed to do that... 34 00:01:22,080 --> 00:01:23,999 - Aha! - Ah, off you go then. 35 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:26,639 Come back soon, yeah? So we can sell you again. 36 00:01:26,640 --> 00:01:27,879 - LAUGHTER 37 00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:29,879 - 38 00:01:29,880 --> 00:01:31,239 39 00:01:31,240 --> 00:01:32,559 40 00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:33,599 - SMACK! 41 00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:34,999 - Evil singing? 42 00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:36,119 Ha! 43 00:01:36,120 --> 00:01:37,999 There's the death penalty for that. 44 00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:39,280 Stop hitting me. 45 00:01:40,880 --> 00:01:42,959 There are even laws dedicated to women. 46 00:01:42,960 --> 00:01:45,359 - Do you mind? This is a funeral! 47 00:01:45,360 --> 00:01:47,079 - And you're crying excessively. 48 00:01:47,080 --> 00:01:48,279 That's against the rules 49 00:01:48,280 --> 00:01:49,559 at a funeral. 50 00:01:49,560 --> 00:01:51,439 - What about him? 51 00:01:51,440 --> 00:01:54,559 - There are no rules about men crying at funerals! 52 00:01:54,560 --> 00:01:56,199 Are you OK, hon? 53 00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:57,319 - Who wrote these laws? 54 00:01:57,320 --> 00:02:00,159 - Men, of course. 55 00:02:00,160 --> 00:02:03,200 So, if you want to be as happy as these two, get the... 56 00:02:04,760 --> 00:02:07,839 - Why would we need 12 tables? We've already got one! 57 00:02:07,840 --> 00:02:10,639 - CHUCKLING - Not that kind of table, silly. 58 00:02:10,640 --> 00:02:11,799 - CRASH 59 00:02:11,800 --> 00:02:15,439 - Yes, find out about The 12 Tables of Roman Law. 60 00:02:15,440 --> 00:02:18,399 These laws are so good, that some of them 61 00:02:18,400 --> 00:02:20,679 will still be around in over 2,000 years. 62 00:02:20,680 --> 00:02:23,519 - Is there anything about hitting an annoying salesman over 63 00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:25,199 the head with a big lump of bronze? 64 00:02:25,200 --> 00:02:26,639 - Well, not exactly. 65 00:02:26,640 --> 00:02:27,999 - Right. 66 00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:29,919 - Oof! 67 00:02:29,920 --> 00:02:31,999 - The 12 Tables of Roman Law. 68 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:34,559 A law for every occasion, almost! 69 00:02:34,560 --> 00:02:36,079 - Uh, that's my line. 70 00:02:36,080 --> 00:02:37,319 - Sh, you! 71 00:02:37,320 --> 00:02:39,519 - GROANS 72 00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:42,679 Yep, throughout history there have been some very strange 73 00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:44,159 and unfair rules. 74 00:02:44,160 --> 00:02:45,839 Don't fish in the sewer! 75 00:02:45,840 --> 00:02:48,679 Don't lick your feet when you're eating! 76 00:02:48,680 --> 00:02:51,479 Honestly, a lot of the time it's like people are making it 77 00:02:51,480 --> 00:02:52,599 up as they go along. 78 00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:56,759 Take William the Conqueror, he became King of England in 1066, 79 00:02:56,760 --> 00:03:01,439 and decided to change some laws to make them less harsh. 80 00:03:01,440 --> 00:03:05,279 To be honest, I think some people wished he hadn't bothered! 81 00:03:05,280 --> 00:03:06,839 Oooh! 82 00:03:06,840 --> 00:03:08,039 - You killed my cousin! 83 00:03:08,040 --> 00:03:11,279 Therefore, your life, we forfeit. 84 00:03:11,280 --> 00:03:13,279 - Whoa, whoa, whoa, guys! 85 00:03:13,280 --> 00:03:17,519 You don't need to swing axe, you need to chillax, am I right? 86 00:03:17,520 --> 00:03:18,559 - SHRUGS 87 00:03:18,560 --> 00:03:20,039 - I'm King William, yeah? 88 00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:22,239 Winner of the Battle of Hastings, 89 00:03:22,240 --> 00:03:23,519 and as the new King, 90 00:03:23,520 --> 00:03:26,399 I get to make the laws now, you feel me? 91 00:03:26,400 --> 00:03:28,079 - He's a murderer, though. 92 00:03:28,080 --> 00:03:31,119 - And would more killing really be the answer? 93 00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:33,199 Do we have to be those guys? 94 00:03:33,200 --> 00:03:36,079 Wouldn't it be better if we could find another way? 95 00:03:36,080 --> 00:03:37,759 - It would, it definitely would. 96 00:03:37,760 --> 00:03:39,599 - Oh, yeah. Big surprise you're saying that. 97 00:03:39,600 --> 00:03:41,919 - This guy, he messed up big time. 98 00:03:41,920 --> 00:03:44,239 But are any of us perfect? 99 00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:45,759 - It's not really the point, he murdered... 100 00:03:45,760 --> 00:03:47,679 - OK, I feel a new law coming on. 101 00:03:47,680 --> 00:03:50,679 As the first Norman King of England, 102 00:03:50,680 --> 00:03:53,199 I proclaim the end... 103 00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:54,839 ..of the death penalty. 104 00:03:54,840 --> 00:03:56,359 - Yeah, boy! 105 00:03:56,360 --> 00:04:00,279 - We will find better ways of living our lives. 106 00:04:00,280 --> 00:04:01,759 - Right, thank you everybody. 107 00:04:01,760 --> 00:04:03,279 It has been intense but, er... 108 00:04:03,280 --> 00:04:05,479 - Whoa! Where are you going? 109 00:04:05,480 --> 00:04:06,679 - I thought we were done. 110 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:08,319 - Oh, no, no, no, no, no. 111 00:04:08,320 --> 00:04:10,679 I'm not letting you go, no way. 112 00:04:10,680 --> 00:04:12,479 I'm going to... 113 00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:15,160 ..poke out his eyes and chop off his dangly bits! 114 00:04:17,280 --> 00:04:18,839 - Eyes and dangly bits. 115 00:04:18,840 --> 00:04:21,119 - Whoa! A bit extreme. 116 00:04:21,120 --> 00:04:22,599 He'll...he'll die anyway, won't he? 117 00:04:22,600 --> 00:04:25,159 - Possibly, I mean, it'll definitely be slow and painful. 118 00:04:25,160 --> 00:04:26,279 - Well, if that's the case, 119 00:04:26,280 --> 00:04:28,119 I might just go back to the straight execution. 120 00:04:28,120 --> 00:04:30,119 - He's comfortable with that, I'm fine with that. 121 00:04:30,120 --> 00:04:33,919 - Ah! No executions, we are NOT monsters! 122 00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:36,519 - OK. Start with the eyes. 123 00:04:36,520 --> 00:04:38,799 - I can't do this, I just feel uncomfortable, I'm sorry. 124 00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:42,719 - Whoa! You know, I am so touched you felt you could say that. 125 00:04:42,720 --> 00:04:45,399 You know, not enough people say no to their King. - Never, never do. 126 00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:46,559 - No, no. 127 00:04:46,560 --> 00:04:48,319 - I think we were all getting a bit, like, hot headed. 128 00:04:48,320 --> 00:04:51,279 You know when men get in a group and we just, kind of go a bit crazy. 129 00:04:51,280 --> 00:04:52,399 - Yeah! 130 00:04:52,400 --> 00:04:54,999 Unfortunately, I am going to have to 131 00:04:55,000 --> 00:04:57,239 find you guilty of disagreeing with the King. 132 00:04:57,240 --> 00:05:01,119 So, punishments, maybe I chop off his hands? 133 00:05:01,120 --> 00:05:04,879 - Chop off his hands for disagreeing with the King. 134 00:05:04,880 --> 00:05:06,639 - Sorry, you can't chop off my hands! I'm a... 135 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:08,759 - Uh-oh! More disagreement! 136 00:05:08,760 --> 00:05:09,919 Better lose the feet, too. 137 00:05:09,920 --> 00:05:11,039 - You can't do this. 138 00:05:11,040 --> 00:05:13,119 - Look, look, I'd stop arguing at this point. 139 00:05:13,120 --> 00:05:14,159 - And his nose. 140 00:05:14,160 --> 00:05:15,439 - Why?! 141 00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:16,559 - Nose, a good shout, yeah. 142 00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:20,159 - Well, at least you get to keep your dangly bits. - OK, guys. We all good? 143 00:05:20,160 --> 00:05:23,439 Isn't this a much nicer way of doing things? 144 00:05:23,440 --> 00:05:25,479 - Absolutely not. In my case I wasn't even... 145 00:05:25,480 --> 00:05:27,639 - Seriously, people are going to love my new laws. 146 00:05:27,640 --> 00:05:30,159 So much more civilised! 147 00:05:30,160 --> 00:05:31,239 Great chat! 148 00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:34,799 - Right, hands up who was the eyes and dangly bits. 149 00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:35,879 - Oh... 150 00:05:35,880 --> 00:05:37,600 - Chop, chop! 151 00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:42,159 - Henry VIII in the house! 152 00:05:42,160 --> 00:05:44,199 Now, I love coming up with new rules, 153 00:05:44,200 --> 00:05:49,039 but did you know I once had the law changed because of soup? 154 00:05:49,040 --> 00:05:50,599 Mmm, soup. 155 00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:52,639 It's nutrish and delish. 156 00:05:52,640 --> 00:05:56,679 Now, in 1531 the Bishop of Rochester's cook, Richard Roose, 157 00:05:56,680 --> 00:05:59,439 said that as a joke, he'd put something in the Bish's soup 158 00:05:59,440 --> 00:06:01,879 which would make anyone who ate it poo a lot! 159 00:06:01,880 --> 00:06:03,439 - Hilarious! 160 00:06:03,440 --> 00:06:06,799 Unfortunately, 17 people were taken ill and one woman actually died. 161 00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:08,959 Turns out, he'd poisoned them by mistake. 162 00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:13,159 So, after this I had the law changed to classify poisoning as treason 163 00:06:13,160 --> 00:06:14,559 and punishable by death. 164 00:06:14,560 --> 00:06:16,999 But how did I decide the poisoner should die? 165 00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:19,880 Was it...? 166 00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:29,519 The answer is... 167 00:06:29,520 --> 00:06:31,639 And that's what happened to Roose, 168 00:06:31,640 --> 00:06:33,759 all because he tried to make poo soup as a prank. 169 00:06:33,760 --> 00:06:36,559 - Who's that? 170 00:06:36,560 --> 00:06:38,519 Probably the dog... 171 00:06:38,520 --> 00:06:40,839 Laters, rule breakers! 172 00:06:40,840 --> 00:06:41,999 - CHUCKLING 173 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:44,839 Well, we've seen some rule MAKERS. 174 00:06:44,840 --> 00:06:47,359 So, what about rule BREAKERS? 175 00:06:47,360 --> 00:06:49,999 When you break the rules at home, 176 00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:51,759 you might get sent to your room, 177 00:06:51,760 --> 00:06:55,999 or banned from chewing the cereal boxes and weeing in the cupboard. 178 00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:58,319 Oh, er, p-probably a rat thing, the last one. 179 00:06:58,320 --> 00:07:02,039 Anyway, it can seem really unfair, but trust me, 180 00:07:02,040 --> 00:07:06,280 things were worse and much stranger in the past. 181 00:07:07,280 --> 00:07:09,559 - Peter of Privy Lane. 182 00:07:09,560 --> 00:07:11,879 You stand accused of theft, 183 00:07:11,880 --> 00:07:13,439 how do you wish to be judged? 184 00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:16,319 - I choose trial by combat, my lady. 185 00:07:16,320 --> 00:07:19,119 Let my accuser and I fight to the death! 186 00:07:19,120 --> 00:07:20,199 - SWORDS CLATTER 187 00:07:20,200 --> 00:07:24,319 - And by the blood on my blade, you shall know that I am innocent. 188 00:07:24,320 --> 00:07:25,919 - Very well, 189 00:07:25,920 --> 00:07:27,479 a fight to the death. 190 00:07:27,480 --> 00:07:29,119 Alderman Plank, 191 00:07:29,120 --> 00:07:32,239 you are accused of disloyalty to your lord. 192 00:07:32,240 --> 00:07:33,839 Choose your judgment. 193 00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:35,879 - I choose trial by ordeal. 194 00:07:35,880 --> 00:07:38,799 Let a red hot poker be placed in my hand. 195 00:07:38,800 --> 00:07:42,439 God shall heal the festering wound and you shall know I am innocent. 196 00:07:42,440 --> 00:07:44,119 - So be it. 197 00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:46,320 Master Carter... 198 00:07:47,320 --> 00:07:49,639 Your crime is poaching, 199 00:07:49,640 --> 00:07:52,799 make your choice. 200 00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:55,159 - I choose trial by cake. 201 00:07:55,160 --> 00:07:56,599 So, I'll eat some cake, 202 00:07:56,600 --> 00:07:58,439 if it be God's will, it will go down nice and smooth. 203 00:07:58,440 --> 00:07:59,759 Then, you'll know I'm innocent. 204 00:07:59,760 --> 00:08:01,479 - Master Carter has... 205 00:08:01,480 --> 00:08:02,639 Yes? 206 00:08:02,640 --> 00:08:04,439 - Sorry, I didn't actually know that cake was an option. 207 00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:05,559 - MURMUR OF AGREEMENT 208 00:08:05,560 --> 00:08:07,919 - The cake is marked with the name of our Lord. 209 00:08:07,920 --> 00:08:10,639 No guilty man will be able to swallow it. 210 00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:13,399 - Yeah, no, sure, but s-still, you know, 211 00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:15,359 a burning, festering hand wound... 212 00:08:15,360 --> 00:08:16,399 ..cake. 213 00:08:16,400 --> 00:08:18,519 - Yes, yes. I, too am interested in the cake option. 214 00:08:18,520 --> 00:08:21,919 - Trial by combat is a noble path, Peter of Privy Lane. 215 00:08:21,920 --> 00:08:24,279 - Yet, cake is awesome and doesn't cut off my leg. 216 00:08:24,280 --> 00:08:27,439 - Very well, bring out the cake! 217 00:08:27,440 --> 00:08:28,880 - INTENSE MUSIC 218 00:08:30,701 --> 00:08:33,719 - That's not cake, that's a biscuit. 219 00:08:33,720 --> 00:08:36,759 - I should warn you, it is very dry cake. 220 00:08:36,760 --> 00:08:38,079 - Oh, I'll cope. 221 00:08:38,080 --> 00:08:41,479 - 'Tis said that Earl Godwin of Kent 222 00:08:41,480 --> 00:08:45,359 was tried by cake and choked to death. 223 00:08:45,360 --> 00:08:48,839 - Yes, well, my cousin chose trial by combat and got cut in half, so... 224 00:08:48,840 --> 00:08:53,319 - There's more! The cake will be cleansed of evil by a priest 225 00:08:53,320 --> 00:08:56,559 and it may have some cheese on top. 226 00:08:56,560 --> 00:08:58,199 - Oh, I love a bit of cheese! 227 00:08:58,200 --> 00:08:59,879 - Sheep's cheese! 228 00:08:59,880 --> 00:09:02,599 - Hmm, it could be worse, it could be blue cheese, urgh! - Yes. 229 00:09:02,600 --> 00:09:05,879 I have decided, God will prove my innocence 230 00:09:05,880 --> 00:09:07,359 with cheese and biscuits. 231 00:09:07,360 --> 00:09:08,559 Lock it in, Lady Gauge. 232 00:09:08,560 --> 00:09:09,639 - Me too! 233 00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:14,119 - We only have two portions of cake. 234 00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:15,319 - Oh! Grrr! 235 00:09:15,320 --> 00:09:16,959 - You snooze, you lose. 236 00:09:16,960 --> 00:09:19,519 - So, what's it going to be, trial by combat or trial by ordeal? 237 00:09:19,520 --> 00:09:20,599 CHUCKLING 238 00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:23,599 - Fine, trial by combat, final answer. 239 00:09:23,600 --> 00:09:24,999 - Thank you. 240 00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:26,799 Although, honestly, 241 00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:30,119 I am surprised none of you chose trial by compurgation. 242 00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:31,159 - Trial by what, now? 243 00:09:31,160 --> 00:09:33,559 - Where you swear your innocence on holy relics. 244 00:09:33,560 --> 00:09:35,999 And then, when eventually you do die, 245 00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:38,039 you let God judge you. 246 00:09:38,040 --> 00:09:39,519 - I'll definitely have that one. 247 00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:41,279 - Sorry, mate, you said final answer. 248 00:09:41,280 --> 00:09:43,559 - Yeah, yeah, you did say that. - It's true, yeah, I heard it. 249 00:09:43,560 --> 00:09:44,639 - I heard it, yeah. 250 00:09:44,640 --> 00:09:48,640 - Right, lunch - all this cake's made me hungry! 251 00:09:51,280 --> 00:09:54,679 - Are you a rooster who may be burned at the stake 252 00:09:54,680 --> 00:09:56,760 just for being found sitting on an egg? 253 00:09:58,120 --> 00:10:02,239 Are you a hive of bees facing the law for stinging a man to death? 254 00:10:02,240 --> 00:10:04,679 Are you a wolf accused of witchcraft 255 00:10:04,680 --> 00:10:07,079 after being seen walking on your hind legs? 256 00:10:07,080 --> 00:10:09,679 Were you forced to wear human clothes at your trial? 257 00:10:09,680 --> 00:10:10,759 - GROWLS 258 00:10:10,760 --> 00:10:13,599 - Then, call the Animal Law Practice today! 259 00:10:13,600 --> 00:10:16,679 Whether you're a chicken, a wolf, a pig or even a beetle, 260 00:10:16,680 --> 00:10:19,239 if you've been accused of a crime, I will fight for you! 261 00:10:19,240 --> 00:10:20,399 - SQUEAL 262 00:10:20,400 --> 00:10:23,559 - Unless you're a group of rats facing persecution. 263 00:10:23,560 --> 00:10:26,759 I will not fight for you! 264 00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:29,599 Because we've got a specialist in rodents and justice, 265 00:10:29,600 --> 00:10:31,039 Bartholemew Chassene. 266 00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:32,839 - I defended the same rats... 267 00:10:32,840 --> 00:10:34,359 - FARTS - ..after they were accused of 268 00:10:34,360 --> 00:10:36,119 destroying the local barley crops. 269 00:10:36,120 --> 00:10:37,359 - Ahh! 270 00:10:37,360 --> 00:10:40,799 - I argued the rats had a right to attend the trial, 271 00:10:40,800 --> 00:10:42,679 but that the journey to the courtroom 272 00:10:42,680 --> 00:10:43,799 was too perilous, 273 00:10:43,800 --> 00:10:47,399 due to the numbers of their deadliest enemies, cats! 274 00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:49,159 Lying in wait along the way. 275 00:10:49,160 --> 00:10:50,319 - SCREECHING 276 00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:51,639 - We don't care how hairy you are, 277 00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:53,279 we don't care how many legs you've got, 278 00:10:53,280 --> 00:10:55,119 we don't even care if you're guilty. 279 00:10:55,120 --> 00:10:56,199 - Uh-huh. 280 00:10:56,200 --> 00:10:57,879 - Call Animal Lawyers today! 281 00:10:57,880 --> 00:10:59,960 - BOTH: We will fight for you! 282 00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:02,599 - Be careful, men. 283 00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:05,879 During these times of Civil War, the roads could 284 00:11:05,880 --> 00:11:07,519 be a haven for criminals. 285 00:11:07,520 --> 00:11:09,039 And frankly, we've got a lot of stuff 286 00:11:09,040 --> 00:11:10,479 that they might be interested in. 287 00:11:10,480 --> 00:11:12,999 - Ah, you mean all the gold in our chest? 288 00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:14,879 - I was trying not to draw attention to that! 289 00:11:14,880 --> 00:11:16,999 Whoa! 290 00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:18,519 It's a woman! 291 00:11:18,520 --> 00:11:19,919 In breeches! 292 00:11:19,920 --> 00:11:21,799 Playing the lute! 293 00:11:21,800 --> 00:11:24,479 - Ahoy! The name's Moll Cutpurse. 294 00:11:24,480 --> 00:11:28,079 - Moll Cutpurse! You used to rob people all up and down the country! 295 00:11:28,080 --> 00:11:29,600 You're well famous! 296 00:11:29,601 --> 00:11:33,599 - I am, and I've got the scars to prove it! 297 00:11:33,600 --> 00:11:35,719 By which, I mean they caught me and scarred my hands 298 00:11:35,720 --> 00:11:38,439 to mark me as a thief and teach me the error of my ways. 299 00:11:38,440 --> 00:11:39,479 - Cool! 300 00:11:39,480 --> 00:11:42,479 - It's not cool, it's punishment for breaking our rules. 301 00:11:42,480 --> 00:11:43,919 Pray may it have worked. 302 00:11:43,920 --> 00:11:44,999 - Don't look like it! 303 00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:46,159 Yeah! 304 00:11:46,160 --> 00:11:47,239 - Hey! 305 00:11:47,240 --> 00:11:48,599 Me money! 306 00:11:48,600 --> 00:11:50,199 Ah, me trousers! 307 00:11:50,200 --> 00:11:52,599 - Oh, you're brilliant! 308 00:11:52,600 --> 00:11:55,999 - And yet, she's still just a petty thief, pickpocketing strangers. 309 00:11:56,000 --> 00:12:00,439 - How dare you! I'm in my 60s now, pursuing me true passions. 310 00:12:00,440 --> 00:12:01,599 - Oh, what's that then? 311 00:12:01,600 --> 00:12:03,759 - Doing stick ups. Hand over your loot 312 00:12:03,760 --> 00:12:05,719 and I don't mean this kind. 313 00:12:05,720 --> 00:12:08,439 - Never! You may be able to scare the common folk, 314 00:12:08,440 --> 00:12:11,679 but I am a general of the highest authority... 315 00:12:11,680 --> 00:12:12,839 - CACKLING 316 00:12:12,840 --> 00:12:14,679 - I demand that you follow the rules of society... 317 00:12:14,680 --> 00:12:15,759 - Oh? 318 00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:18,479 - ..and the power of the law... 319 00:12:18,480 --> 00:12:19,679 - Should have told you, 320 00:12:19,680 --> 00:12:21,359 I don't care about the rules to society. 321 00:12:21,360 --> 00:12:22,559 - She's brilliant. 322 00:12:22,560 --> 00:12:23,879 - Are none of you going to help? 323 00:12:23,880 --> 00:12:25,599 - Come on, lads, help me out. 324 00:12:25,600 --> 00:12:26,839 Cutpurse away! 325 00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:28,159 - Oh, the shame. 326 00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:30,239 My breeches are round me ankles! 327 00:12:30,240 --> 00:12:32,319 - Oh, brilliant. 328 00:12:32,320 --> 00:12:34,319 - Of course, if you did break the rules, 329 00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:36,319 it didn't always mean you get punished. 330 00:12:36,320 --> 00:12:38,319 In the past, there have been some weird and wonderful 331 00:12:38,320 --> 00:12:40,319 ways of getting away with it. 332 00:12:40,320 --> 00:12:41,879 Like claiming sanctuary, which 333 00:12:41,880 --> 00:12:45,519 meant you couldn't be arrested as long as you were on church grounds. 334 00:12:45,520 --> 00:12:47,079 Sneaky! 335 00:12:47,080 --> 00:12:49,839 Luckily, monks don't commit crimes. 336 00:12:49,840 --> 00:12:51,599 Well, apart from Brother Peter. 337 00:12:51,600 --> 00:12:54,119 He stole some grey cloth and I'm afraid to say, 338 00:12:54,120 --> 00:12:56,999 he made a habit out of it... 339 00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:58,720 Ah, that's a monk joke. 340 00:12:59,880 --> 00:13:02,479 - Oi! Come back here! 341 00:13:02,480 --> 00:13:04,959 - A-y-y-y...yes! 342 00:13:04,960 --> 00:13:06,479 Woo! 343 00:13:06,480 --> 00:13:08,039 You can't get me now, Sheriff! 344 00:13:08,040 --> 00:13:09,399 - You're cornered. 345 00:13:09,400 --> 00:13:11,079 Right, I'm arresting you for... 346 00:13:11,080 --> 00:13:12,759 - Oi, what are you doing? 347 00:13:12,760 --> 00:13:14,879 I'm claiming church sanctuary. 348 00:13:14,880 --> 00:13:16,319 According to the law, 349 00:13:16,320 --> 00:13:19,079 you cannot arrest me whilst I am inside this church. 350 00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:20,759 - Well, you're not in the church. 351 00:13:20,760 --> 00:13:23,239 - Yeah, but I'm on church land and that counts. 352 00:13:23,240 --> 00:13:24,319 So, you know, 353 00:13:24,320 --> 00:13:25,999 bad luck! 354 00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:27,159 You can get me now, though. - Uhh! 355 00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:28,999 - No, you can't! 356 00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:30,079 You can get me now, though. 357 00:13:30,080 --> 00:13:31,119 You can't get me. 358 00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:32,679 - I'll just wait right here, then. 359 00:13:32,680 --> 00:13:35,919 But eventually, you're going to have to come out and when you do, 360 00:13:35,920 --> 00:13:37,279 I'm going to arrest you. 361 00:13:37,280 --> 00:13:39,359 - Oh, well, I wouldn't count on it. 362 00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:42,919 The law says I have 40 days to decide what I want to do. 363 00:13:42,920 --> 00:13:46,159 - And what's a criminal like you going to do in a church, eh? 364 00:13:46,160 --> 00:13:48,199 - Loads, actually. 365 00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:51,759 Join the choir, meditate. - Nice. 366 00:13:51,760 --> 00:13:53,559 - Squat at a pot. 367 00:13:53,560 --> 00:13:54,999 - No, it's called gardening. 368 00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:56,599 - Anyway, who said I did anything? 369 00:13:56,600 --> 00:13:59,199 - Oh, come off it, nobody claims church sanctuary 370 00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:00,399 if they're innocent. 371 00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:01,479 - Yeah, fair enough, I did it. 372 00:14:01,480 --> 00:14:02,599 - I knew it! 373 00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:05,199 - I stole a pig and I gave it to my girlfriend for a present. 374 00:14:05,200 --> 00:14:06,279 - PIG SQUEALS 375 00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:08,079 - I'm a filthy pig rustler! 376 00:14:08,080 --> 00:14:10,719 But the law is the law. 377 00:14:10,720 --> 00:14:12,719 So, you... 378 00:14:12,720 --> 00:14:14,519 ..can't... 379 00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:15,599 ..touch me... 380 00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:16,639 - GRUNTS 381 00:14:16,640 --> 00:14:18,079 - All right, Dave? 382 00:14:18,080 --> 00:14:19,239 Are you arresting him? 383 00:14:19,240 --> 00:14:22,199 - Trying to, Caroline, but he's claimed sanctuary, hasn't he? 384 00:14:22,200 --> 00:14:23,479 - Oh, didn't you hear? 385 00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:24,599 - What's that? 386 00:14:24,600 --> 00:14:26,919 - King Henry changed the laws on that last week. 387 00:14:26,920 --> 00:14:27,999 - Did he? 388 00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:30,839 - From now on, all criminals are fair game. 389 00:14:30,840 --> 00:14:31,959 - Is that right? 390 00:14:31,960 --> 00:14:33,559 - Getting out of here. - Oh, oh! 391 00:14:33,560 --> 00:14:34,999 - Oh, come on! 392 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:37,039 - Oh, would you look at that! 393 00:14:37,040 --> 00:14:39,559 - I was just having a laugh, I was joking! 394 00:14:39,560 --> 00:14:41,199 - Right, you're coming with me! 395 00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:44,239 - VICAR: - Pardon me, I couldn't help overhearing, my child, 396 00:14:44,240 --> 00:14:47,239 did you say that the King has removed the rights of criminals 397 00:14:47,240 --> 00:14:48,999 to take sanctuary on church land? 398 00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:50,999 - That's right, vicar. 399 00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:52,119 - All right, boys, the game's up. 400 00:14:52,120 --> 00:14:54,359 Rob what you can and let's go. 401 00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:55,399 - Oh! 402 00:14:55,400 --> 00:14:59,039 - That's it, run, run, run, run! Move! 403 00:14:59,040 --> 00:15:00,480 - Here, clumsy. 404 00:15:01,560 --> 00:15:05,919 - There had certainly been a lot of rule breakers over the years 405 00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:09,319 and that's why we've needed people to try and stop them. 406 00:15:09,320 --> 00:15:10,759 In the 19th century, 407 00:15:10,760 --> 00:15:15,079 Sir Robert Peel created Britain's first professional police force. 408 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:16,639 But in those early days, 409 00:15:16,640 --> 00:15:19,199 being a "Peeler" as they were called, 410 00:15:19,200 --> 00:15:22,560 wasn't exactly an easy or popular job. 411 00:15:27,800 --> 00:15:29,919 - Oi! You, come back here! 412 00:15:29,920 --> 00:15:30,999 - WHISTLE BLARES 413 00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:32,479 - You'll never catch me, copper! 414 00:15:32,480 --> 00:15:33,839 - MUSIC: TO THE TUNE OF HARD KNOCK'S LIFE 415 00:15:33,840 --> 00:15:36,319 416 00:15:36,320 --> 00:15:39,519 417 00:15:39,520 --> 00:15:42,559 418 00:15:42,560 --> 00:15:45,759 419 00:15:45,760 --> 00:15:47,319 420 00:15:47,320 --> 00:15:50,119 - really hard labour 421 00:15:50,120 --> 00:15:51,479 422 00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:53,319 423 00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:55,799 illiterate 424 00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:57,479 425 00:15:57,480 --> 00:15:59,119 426 00:15:59,120 --> 00:16:00,679 - 427 00:16:00,680 --> 00:16:02,039 428 00:16:02,040 --> 00:16:03,599 429 00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:04,959 430 00:16:04,960 --> 00:16:06,679 431 00:16:06,680 --> 00:16:08,159 - 432 00:16:08,160 --> 00:16:09,919 - gritty 433 00:16:09,920 --> 00:16:10,959 - 434 00:16:10,960 --> 00:16:13,159 435 00:16:13,160 --> 00:16:16,519 436 00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:17,759 437 00:16:17,760 --> 00:16:22,559 day 438 00:16:22,560 --> 00:16:23,999 439 00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:26,919 - minimum income 440 00:16:26,920 --> 00:16:28,559 441 00:16:28,560 --> 00:16:29,639 442 00:16:29,640 --> 00:16:32,919 the new norm 443 00:16:32,920 --> 00:16:36,119 woollen uniform 444 00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:37,639 - 445 00:16:37,640 --> 00:16:39,119 - 446 00:16:39,120 --> 00:16:42,359 - 447 00:16:42,360 --> 00:16:45,599 - 448 00:16:45,600 --> 00:16:48,399 449 00:16:48,400 --> 00:16:51,559 our zero hours contract... 450 00:16:51,560 --> 00:16:54,279 - Out of my way, Peelers! 451 00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:56,199 - 452 00:16:56,200 --> 00:16:57,599 453 00:16:57,600 --> 00:17:00,759 compulsory whiskers 454 00:17:00,760 --> 00:17:02,239 - 455 00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:03,599 - 456 00:17:03,600 --> 00:17:04,919 - 457 00:17:04,920 --> 00:17:06,159 - 458 00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:08,799 459 00:17:08,800 --> 00:17:11,879 460 00:17:11,880 --> 00:17:14,919 461 00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:18,159 462 00:17:18,160 --> 00:17:21,039 463 00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:24,199 464 00:17:24,200 --> 00:17:26,799 465 00:17:26,800 --> 00:17:28,679 Some rules were a bit odd. 466 00:17:28,680 --> 00:17:30,359 Like, the one that said 467 00:17:30,360 --> 00:17:34,079 all mute swans in England belonged to the King or Queen. 468 00:17:34,080 --> 00:17:36,519 That particular rule actually ruffled a lot of feathers... 469 00:17:36,520 --> 00:17:37,719 DRUMS: BA-DUM-TSS 470 00:17:37,720 --> 00:17:40,999 Anyway, that's why I have a goose. 471 00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:43,599 Did you like my egg-cellent joke, Susan? 472 00:17:43,600 --> 00:17:44,839 HONK-HONK 473 00:17:44,840 --> 00:17:47,119 She thinks it honked. Harsh. 474 00:17:47,120 --> 00:17:52,240 Anyway, that one rule put one woman in quite a flap. 475 00:17:54,120 --> 00:17:56,159 Sorting out the beefs of the past... 476 00:17:56,160 --> 00:17:58,359 - Hannibal, you may have taken elephants over the Alps 477 00:17:58,360 --> 00:17:59,839 when you attacked Rome, 478 00:17:59,840 --> 00:18:02,199 but you may not bring them into my courtroom! 479 00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:04,159 - ..with the justice of today. 480 00:18:04,160 --> 00:18:06,639 - There's few enough buns to go round as it is! 481 00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:09,240 - Welcome to... 482 00:18:11,120 --> 00:18:14,239 Dorset based landowner, Dame Joan Young, 483 00:18:14,240 --> 00:18:15,839 has brought Queen Elizabeth I 484 00:18:15,840 --> 00:18:19,159 to court over a disagreement about some valuable property. 485 00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:20,279 - I do love cases involving royalty. 486 00:18:20,280 --> 00:18:23,439 Now, what's this about? Crowns? Sceptres? 487 00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:24,479 - Swans. 488 00:18:24,480 --> 00:18:25,759 - I'm sorry, what now? 489 00:18:25,760 --> 00:18:28,359 - This one's swanning off with my swans! 490 00:18:28,360 --> 00:18:32,359 - Oh, please! They're my swans, not your swans. 491 00:18:32,360 --> 00:18:34,799 All mute swans are the property of the Crown, 492 00:18:34,800 --> 00:18:36,919 ie, me, the Queen, Queen of the swans. 493 00:18:36,920 --> 00:18:38,759 - Oh, swan right off, you swanny-swan! 494 00:18:38,760 --> 00:18:42,279 - Everybody stop saying swan. 495 00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:45,159 Now, Dame Joan, what is this about? 496 00:18:45,160 --> 00:18:46,879 - She's trying to take away my 497 00:18:46,880 --> 00:18:52,919 white, feathery, erm, goose-like, water birds... 498 00:18:52,920 --> 00:18:55,479 - OK, OK, look, you can say it just this once. 499 00:18:55,480 --> 00:18:56,639 - My swans. 500 00:18:56,640 --> 00:18:57,679 - HONKING 501 00:18:57,680 --> 00:18:59,639 - And you've brought them with you, great. 502 00:18:59,640 --> 00:19:03,479 Just what I wanted, my courtroom to smell like a bird bath. 503 00:19:03,480 --> 00:19:06,399 - My swans used to belong to the Abbey of St Peter, 504 00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:09,439 but when King Henry VIII closed the monasteries, 505 00:19:09,440 --> 00:19:13,279 he gave the land, and its swans, to my family. 506 00:19:13,280 --> 00:19:16,959 - They're royal swans and they belong to me! 507 00:19:16,960 --> 00:19:20,759 - Your Honour, my swans are an important part of my estate. 508 00:19:20,760 --> 00:19:23,919 They're beautiful, graceful and delicious. 509 00:19:23,920 --> 00:19:26,119 - Yes, well, I think... 510 00:19:26,120 --> 00:19:28,719 Wait a second, d-d-did you say delicious? 511 00:19:28,720 --> 00:19:30,119 - Mmm, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes! 512 00:19:30,120 --> 00:19:32,559 Roast swan? With yellow pepper sauce? 513 00:19:32,560 --> 00:19:34,079 - O-o-oh! - Daddy's favourite! 514 00:19:34,080 --> 00:19:37,159 - Order! This is Time Beefs not MasterChef. 515 00:19:37,160 --> 00:19:38,799 - Well, we could let the swans decide. 516 00:19:38,800 --> 00:19:41,319 - Or, I could be like a swan and peck your arm 517 00:19:41,320 --> 00:19:42,839 with a single blow of a wing. 518 00:19:42,840 --> 00:19:43,959 - WHIPPING 519 00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:47,159 - Oh, that does it! You shut that beak up, or I will! 520 00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:48,439 - OK, order, order! 521 00:19:48,440 --> 00:19:50,239 We'll have no FOWL play in here! 522 00:19:50,240 --> 00:19:52,239 Get it? FOWL, like, birds... 523 00:19:52,240 --> 00:19:54,879 Let the record show, I made an excellent joke. 524 00:19:54,880 --> 00:19:56,479 Now, everybody settle down, 525 00:19:56,480 --> 00:19:58,079 I'm ready to give my ruling. 526 00:19:58,080 --> 00:20:02,879 - Before you do, perhaps I could offer you a little snackette? 527 00:20:02,880 --> 00:20:04,319 It's a swannish roll. 528 00:20:04,320 --> 00:20:06,119 A sausage roll but more feathery. 529 00:20:06,120 --> 00:20:07,239 - GRUNTING 530 00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:10,519 - No, Your Majesty, I don't take kindly to your bribery. 531 00:20:10,520 --> 00:20:12,799 But, mind you, that does smell like great swan. 532 00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:15,439 That's it, I rule in favour of the Queen 533 00:20:15,440 --> 00:20:17,599 All swans belong to her. 534 00:20:17,600 --> 00:20:19,919 - Ahh! In your face, swan-napper! 535 00:20:19,920 --> 00:20:21,919 - No! Give me my swans! 536 00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:23,559 You! - Ahhhh! 537 00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:25,999 - Get them out. 538 00:20:26,000 --> 00:20:28,399 Er, the court will now take five minutes recess 539 00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:30,359 while I eat my swannish roll. 540 00:20:30,360 --> 00:20:31,759 - SCREAMING 541 00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:36,839 - Do we have any cases involving pickle? 542 00:20:36,840 --> 00:20:38,759 - Bang, bang, bang... 543 00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:41,319 Bang, bang, bang... 544 00:20:41,320 --> 00:20:42,439 - Can I help you? 545 00:20:42,440 --> 00:20:43,599 - No. 546 00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:45,599 Bang, bang, bang... 547 00:20:45,600 --> 00:20:46,879 Bang... 548 00:20:46,880 --> 00:20:48,079 - What are you doing? 549 00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:51,759 - Well, I am banging a gong and shouting, duh! 550 00:20:51,760 --> 00:20:55,359 Bang, bang, bang... 551 00:20:55,360 --> 00:20:57,759 - OK, can you stop? It's very annoying. 552 00:20:57,760 --> 00:20:59,639 - Well, I can stop, 553 00:20:59,640 --> 00:21:02,399 but I won't, because you find it annoying. 554 00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:04,559 Bang, bang, bang... 555 00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:06,119 - Why are you doing this? 556 00:21:06,120 --> 00:21:07,799 - Don't you like loud noises? 557 00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:09,319 I'm surprised, 558 00:21:09,320 --> 00:21:13,359 you seemed OK with making a racket outside my house yesterday morning. 559 00:21:13,360 --> 00:21:16,359 - OK, I'm sorry, it was our marching band practice. 560 00:21:16,360 --> 00:21:19,039 We got carried away, you know, you're feeling the music. 561 00:21:19,040 --> 00:21:20,879 - Hey, forget it. I am! 562 00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:22,039 - Thanks. 563 00:21:22,040 --> 00:21:23,679 - Bang, bang, bang... 564 00:21:23,680 --> 00:21:25,359 - Are you sure you've forgotten about it? 565 00:21:25,360 --> 00:21:28,159 Because it seems like you absolutely haven't forgotten about it. 566 00:21:28,160 --> 00:21:29,239 - Well! 567 00:21:29,240 --> 00:21:30,319 - What's all this? 568 00:21:30,320 --> 00:21:32,439 It sounds incredibly annoying. 569 00:21:32,440 --> 00:21:34,479 - Well, it's meant to be! 570 00:21:34,480 --> 00:21:35,679 - Then, you're under arrest. 571 00:21:35,680 --> 00:21:36,999 - Arrest? 572 00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:41,879 - Being annoying is against chapter 22 of the 1860 penal code, 573 00:21:41,880 --> 00:21:44,519 and you just confessed. 574 00:21:44,520 --> 00:21:48,359 - Oh, how you like me now?! 575 00:21:48,360 --> 00:21:50,479 Marching band practice is back on! 576 00:21:50,480 --> 00:21:53,119 Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! 577 00:21:53,120 --> 00:21:54,759 You're going to prison, baby! 578 00:21:54,760 --> 00:21:56,759 Eating the prison dahl, oh! 579 00:21:56,760 --> 00:21:59,359 There's barely any spices in there. 580 00:21:59,360 --> 00:22:01,320 Gong, baby. Gong. 581 00:22:05,120 --> 00:22:06,399 - TUTTING 582 00:22:06,400 --> 00:22:07,439 - What? 583 00:22:07,440 --> 00:22:08,519 - That was pretty annoying. 584 00:22:08,520 --> 00:22:10,679 You're also under arrest. 585 00:22:10,680 --> 00:22:12,679 You know, you could both serve up to two years in prison 586 00:22:12,680 --> 00:22:13,759 for being annoying? 587 00:22:13,760 --> 00:22:16,159 - Hey, come on! Hey, now, you're being annoying. 588 00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:17,959 - Would you like to report a crime? - What? 589 00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:20,039 - You said my colleague was being annoying, that's a crime. 590 00:22:20,040 --> 00:22:21,719 I'm arresting you for being annoying, 591 00:22:21,720 --> 00:22:23,439 while arresting them for being annoying. 592 00:22:23,440 --> 00:22:26,319 Although, I imagine that must be pretty annoying. 593 00:22:26,320 --> 00:22:28,759 So feel free to arrest me in return. 594 00:22:28,760 --> 00:22:30,639 - Who came up with this law anyway? 595 00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:31,959 - The British Raj. 596 00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:33,319 - BOTH: Ah. 597 00:22:33,320 --> 00:22:35,080 - Now THEY are annoying. 598 00:22:36,160 --> 00:22:37,799 - Tell me more. 599 00:22:37,800 --> 00:22:39,559 - So... 600 00:22:39,560 --> 00:22:42,879 - Oh, my goodness, guys, we have the most special show for you today. 601 00:22:42,880 --> 00:22:45,439 We are going to be springing a surprise on a servant 602 00:22:45,440 --> 00:22:48,959 that has been working very, very hard. - Not at his job! 603 00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:50,799 - No, he is a terrible servant. 604 00:22:50,800 --> 00:22:52,919 He has been working very hard on his fashion. 605 00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:55,639 - Seriously, we could not make this guy look any better, 606 00:22:55,640 --> 00:22:57,079 so let's meet him. 607 00:22:57,080 --> 00:22:59,599 Robert Linton, servant to Queen Elizabeth? 608 00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:02,279 - Yes. - You look amazeballs. 609 00:23:02,280 --> 00:23:04,839 - It should be against the law 610 00:23:04,840 --> 00:23:06,039 for a servant to look that good. 611 00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:09,199 - And guess what? It - is - against the law. 612 00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:12,279 - What? - You're going to prison for looking so fabuloso! 613 00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:13,880 - HE MOCK-SCREAMS 614 00:23:21,991 --> 00:23:27,639 - I don't want to go to prison. You're both dressed exactly like me. 615 00:23:27,640 --> 00:23:31,759 - Of course. We are courtiers. We are allowed to look this fabulous. 616 00:23:31,760 --> 00:23:34,919 - But a lowly servant boy like you needs to look 617 00:23:34,920 --> 00:23:37,959 as unimpressive as you actually are. 618 00:23:37,960 --> 00:23:39,999 - We are here to keep you out of prison, mate. 619 00:23:40,000 --> 00:23:44,079 - Yeah, we're going to be giving you our first-ever make-under! 620 00:23:44,080 --> 00:23:45,130 - Wha-ha-hat?! 621 00:23:45,591 --> 00:23:51,759 - Do you know what? His big, padded, fashionable Tudor bottom 622 00:23:51,760 --> 00:23:53,999 looks fantastic! I mean what have you got stuffed down there? 623 00:23:54,000 --> 00:23:56,439 A couple of cushions? Now Tudor fashion laws say 624 00:23:56,440 --> 00:24:00,479 servants are only allowed 1.6 metres of padding. 625 00:24:00,480 --> 00:24:01,919 - Them's the rules! 626 00:24:01,920 --> 00:24:03,399 - What? I'm not allowed to have 627 00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:04,879 a metre and a half of padding on my bum? 628 00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:07,079 - Oh, no, you're not allowed any on your bum. 629 00:24:07,080 --> 00:24:10,439 You're supposed to wear it on your legs, not your backside. 630 00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:13,319 - And what do you call this? It is divine! 631 00:24:13,320 --> 00:24:14,599 - It's silk! 632 00:24:14,600 --> 00:24:16,599 - Uh-oh! Somebody call the fashion police. 633 00:24:16,600 --> 00:24:20,159 - Whoop-whoop! - It is against the law for anyone lower than a baron 634 00:24:20,160 --> 00:24:22,519 to wear silk or satin in Tudor England. 635 00:24:22,520 --> 00:24:26,559 - What?! - So let's put that flash in the trash! 636 00:24:26,560 --> 00:24:29,640 BOTH: It's time this servant got served. 637 00:24:34,360 --> 00:24:38,199 Before we met Robert, he was dressed to impress. 638 00:24:38,200 --> 00:24:41,679 - But, thanks to us, he's gone from fab to drab. 639 00:24:41,680 --> 00:24:44,039 Oh! 640 00:24:44,040 --> 00:24:45,839 - Ooh! - I look awful. 641 00:24:45,840 --> 00:24:47,359 - You are welcome. 642 00:24:47,360 --> 00:24:49,719 - You look plain, boring. It is so you. 643 00:24:49,720 --> 00:24:51,959 - Just as a servant of your rank should look. 644 00:24:51,960 --> 00:24:53,959 WEAKLY: - Yay! - But there's no need to look 645 00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:55,759 as miserable as your sad little outfit. 646 00:24:55,760 --> 00:24:58,959 - Cos guess what? You're not going to prison any more! 647 00:24:58,960 --> 00:25:00,079 CANNED CHEERING 648 00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:01,799 And we've got another surprise for you. 649 00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:03,239 It's only Queen Elizabeth! 650 00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:06,159 - Hello! Yes, it's me! 651 00:25:06,160 --> 00:25:07,799 - Yes, Queen! 652 00:25:07,800 --> 00:25:09,839 - Now, the all-important question. 653 00:25:09,840 --> 00:25:12,279 What do you think of our servant? 654 00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:14,639 - Him? I barely noticed him when I came in. 655 00:25:14,640 --> 00:25:16,519 - Our work here is done. 656 00:25:16,520 --> 00:25:19,359 - And you, you look amazing! 657 00:25:19,360 --> 00:25:21,359 How much padding you got in those trunks? 658 00:25:21,360 --> 00:25:23,479 - I'm not wearing any padding. 659 00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:24,719 - Oh. 660 00:25:24,720 --> 00:25:27,479 - That's all we've got time for for today's make-under. 661 00:25:27,480 --> 00:25:28,919 Until next time! 662 00:25:28,920 --> 00:25:31,319 - Did you hear what she said. - Yeah. - Ah-ah. 663 00:25:31,320 --> 00:25:34,679 - Sometimes in history, there have been rules that were so unfair, 664 00:25:34,680 --> 00:25:36,359 they needed changing. 665 00:25:36,360 --> 00:25:38,759 And changing those rules meant breaking them. 666 00:25:38,760 --> 00:25:41,519 That's what the suffragettes were doing when they protested 667 00:25:41,520 --> 00:25:44,279 about women not being allowed to vote. 668 00:25:44,280 --> 00:25:47,559 One famous protestor was Rosa May Billinghurst, 669 00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:51,880 She didn't let any rules get in the way of fighting for her rights. 670 00:26:03,400 --> 00:26:07,679 - 671 00:26:07,680 --> 00:26:10,599 672 00:26:10,600 --> 00:26:13,719 673 00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:18,599 674 00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:21,319 675 00:26:21,320 --> 00:26:23,839 676 00:26:23,840 --> 00:26:27,119 fuss 677 00:26:27,120 --> 00:26:29,760 678 00:26:31,560 --> 00:26:34,239 679 00:26:34,240 --> 00:26:38,879 in 680 00:26:38,880 --> 00:26:43,439 campaign 681 00:26:43,440 --> 00:26:48,519 see 682 00:26:48,520 --> 00:26:50,480 683 00:26:56,400 --> 00:27:00,080 684 00:27:01,640 --> 00:27:05,319 685 00:27:05,320 --> 00:27:09,279 686 00:27:09,280 --> 00:27:12,440 687 00:27:14,960 --> 00:27:18,639 688 00:27:18,640 --> 00:27:21,400 689 00:27:22,520 --> 00:27:25,839 690 00:27:25,840 --> 00:27:29,199 691 00:27:29,200 --> 00:27:33,759 692 00:27:33,760 --> 00:27:37,199 693 00:27:37,200 --> 00:27:40,679 694 00:27:40,680 --> 00:27:44,079 695 00:27:44,080 --> 00:27:49,160 696 00:27:50,600 --> 00:27:53,000 Sometimes you have to break the rules. 697 00:27:57,560 --> 00:28:00,319 - And they belong to me. 698 00:28:00,320 --> 00:28:03,519 Daddy loves a bam. 699 00:28:03,520 --> 00:28:04,559 - Sheep's cheeks... 700 00:28:04,560 --> 00:28:07,080 LAUGHTER 701 00:28:08,400 --> 00:28:11,199 - 702 00:28:11,200 --> 00:28:16,320 - Horrible Histories. 703 00:28:16,370 --> 00:28:20,920 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0